Empathy is a key leadership skill.1 Sailors and Marines need engaged leaders who show they care. Empathy prevents isolation and creates a protective environment that can reduce suicidal ideations and behaviors.
The barriers to seeking mental health support cannot be eliminated until leaders are willing to seek help themselves. In more than a decade in uniform and now as a drilling reservist and member of the Senior Executive Service, I have frequently heard suicidal ideations as something experienced by other people. There also is frequently an undertone of dismissal: Those kids have mental health conditions and therefore do not belong in my Navy or Marine Corps.
Consider two comments I heard last year while on reserve duty. First, during a training session for the reserve commanding officer/executive officer/officer-in-charge professional qualification standard on command programs, the facilitator, a Navy commander, said while discussing mental health programs available to the fleet: “Fortunately, I’ve never had to use these resources myself.” During another course, a flag officer addressed 150 O-4s through O-6s and said, “People with mental issues won’t help me beat Russia and China and should get out of the Navy.” These messages reinforce stigma and undermine the intent of the senior defense leaders who proclaim “mental health is health” and seeking help is normal and necessary.
Empathetic leadership means fundamentally understanding, at a personal level, the challenges sailors and Marines face. Most sailors and Marines have experienced trauma in their lives. So have their leaders. Moving, divorce, and death of a loved one are considered among the most stressful life events, and these are common experiences in the military. In addition, sexual assault, combat trauma, and moral injury are pervasive—if we have not experienced them personally, we are close to someone who has.
As a leader, supporting your sailors and Marines starts with understanding and supporting yourself. Consider this: How are you sleeping? Poor sleep often is the “check engine” light that indicates anxiety is getting out of control. That fatigue can make us more irritable, which we often take out on those closest to us, straining our primary relationships. Regardless of operational tempo, it is critical that Sea Service leaders take time to address their mental health and wellness—and ensure their staff has time and space to do so as well. On my second deployment, I not only made time to exercise every day, but I would go topside to watch the sunrise every morning after getting off watch at 0630. It was time to reflect and reset, and it belonged only to me.
While leaders need to apply best practices to respond to those in crisis, they must promote suicide prevention efforts on a daily basis. Sea Service leaders should create a protective environment that reduces suicidal ideations and behaviors by eliminating unnecessary stressors and promoting mental well-being. Leaders need to focus discussions about suicide prevention on everyday mental well-being and employ habitual clinical and nonclinical efforts to promote connectedness, improve access to professional nonclinical counseling and clinical mental health care, and eliminate penalties for those who seek help.
We also need to say the quiet part out loud: In many parts of the force, there still is a penalty for seeking mental health support, including many administrative obstacles. I spent five years in the Navy Reserve with a medical administrative code in my record rendering me nondeployable because I receive disability compensation from the Department of Veterans Affairs for post-traumatic stress disorder—a condition I had when I transferred from the active to reserve component—even while my physical health assessments found me fit for full duty. That code, which was entered into my record in September 2016, was only finally removed in October 2021 after multiple reviews and appeals, revealing that the Navy’s systems are misaligned. In reality, a large portion of your formation is living with some kind of trauma or mental health condition. Wouldn’t you prefer they get support for their traumas and be more capable of fulfilling the mission?
One of the most powerful things Sea Service leaders can do is have difficult conversations with their sailors, Marines, and Department of the Navy civilians. Both clinicians and senior enlisted have shared that one of the fleet’s greatest needs is engaged, empathetic leaders who make time for their sailors and Marines. To support Sea Service leaders in building these skills, the Department of the Navy developed a Townhall Toolkit—resources and multimedia presentations of leaders discussing various topics and ways to support mental fitness and build resilient teams. The Navy and Marine Corps also have numerous resources to support leaders at all levels in this effort.
Here are some suggestions for actions leaders can take today to remove barriers to promoting mental health and wellness:
• Devote time during the workday to mental wellness. Physical fitness improves mental wellness—what time are you devoting specifically to mental wellness? Also consider using command-authorized PT time for mindfulness activities such as yoga. Modeling these behaviors encourages others to engage in healthier behaviors.
• Eliminate commanders from the notification chain if one of their sailors or Marines has gone to a mental health appointment. While command notification is required by Department of Defense and service policy only in the most acute cases, it is still frequently practiced. This creates the perception that the Sea Services care more about protecting their institutions than their service members. Leaders should already be engaged with their people and should be notified only in case of a suicidal ideation or suicide attempt. The only thing a commander should know is if a service member is deployable or not, based on the determination of a medical professional. Commanders also should not pressure medical professionals into a decision.
• Incorporate service member preference into the decision about their disposition. Leaving a service member behind from deployment or removing them from their unit can damage otherwise stable mental health because it is removing someone from their support network and causing them to lose purpose. The services should trust sailors and Marines who say they can both seek help and healing and continue to be mission focused.
• Reframe the language used to discuss mental health. Mental health challenges can be addressed and barriers can be overcome when leaders frame mental health in terms of normal, even routine, maintenance. As service members, we keep the tools of our profession--including our bodies--mission ready. We must do the same thing for our emotional health and wellness.
1. Researchers are finding that empathy is the most important leadership skill in workplaces. The military is no different. See Tracy Brower, “Empathy Is the Most Important Leadership Skill According to Research,” Forbes, 19 September 2021.