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Life's Rules

By Captain John Byron, U.S. Navy (Retired)
August 2002
Proceedings
Vol. 128/8/1,194
Article
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What follows is a compendium of axioms and aphorisms sure to bring glory and happiness to naval officers who seek out their wisdom.

On the Profession & One's Posture as a Naval Officer

1. Justice will triumph, right prevail, and goodness is its own reward. (Wardroom, USS Trout [SS-566])

2. Perpetual optimism is a force multiplier. (General Colin Powell, USA)

3. Deeds, not words. (Rear Admiral Robert Welander—motto of USS Fox [CG-33])

4. The naval officer's job is to set standards. (Lieutenant Commander Don Todaro, USN)

5. Manage for success. (Adage from U.S. business)

6. If you're gonna be a bear, be a grizzly. (Chief Warrant Officer Gerry McNally, USN)

7. If you're not having fun, you're not doing it right. (Submarine Prospective Commanding Officer Course)

8. Potential is interesting—performance counts. (Captain Jim Beatty, USN)

9. We are all victims of our own experience. (Commander Don Kniss, USN)

10. Avoid having your ego so close to your position that when your position falls, your ego goes with it. (General Colin Powell, USA)

11. Be comfortable taking risks with ideas. (Lieutenant General Brad Hosmer, USAF)

12. If we make no enemies, we should question the worth of our work. (Susan George)

On Dealing with the People of the Navy

13. There aren't any new problems in the Navy, just new people. (Commander Don Kniss, USN)

14. It's a chiefs' Navy. (Seaman First Class Joe Byron, USN)

15. Always look out for the little people. (Captain Luke Riley, USN)

16. Don't come down on a guy from the top. (Admiral Frank Kelso, USN)

17. People are no damn good. (Anonymous submarine executive officer)

18. Time wounds all heels. (Commander David Thaxton, USN)

On One's Social Conduct

19. Go light on the vices, such as carrying on in society—the social ramble ain't restful. (Satchel Paige)

20. Never get your honey where you get your money. (GS12 Art Fasco)

21. Pay double, tip heavy, and you'll always have a good time. (Commander Dave Thaxton, USN)

On the Naval Officer's Craft

22. Everyone can do something for you. (Captain Bo Bohannon, USN)

23. It's all number one priority. (Admiral Kinnard McKee, USN)

24. Money is a fairly cheap commodity. (Vice Admiral Glenwood Clark, USN)

25. When you have a problem, go to the man who owns the organ—don't talk to the monkey. (Lieutenant [junior grade) Bernie Beranek's Organ Grinder Principle)

26. Always walk the parade route. (Source unknown)

27. Some days you eat the bear, some days the bear eats you. (Source unknown)

28. There's never been a collision between two ships 10,000 yards apart. (Lieutenant Ron Speers, USN)

29. The most dangerous object in the world is a tool in the hands of an officer. (Senior Chief Electrician's Mate Sam Holloway, USN)

30. Don't tell me why you can't—tell me how your going to. (Rear Admiral Mike Coyle, USN)

31. Natural laws have no pity. (Commander David Thaxton, USN)

32. The stupid will be punished. (Commander David Thaxton, USN)

33. Never a doubt! (To be said as a mantra after surviving a dicey situation; Captain Bart Bacon, USN)

34. If you're not lucky, we can't use you. (Captain Ron Wiltsie, USN)

So that's it, 34 rules a naval officer needs to survive and prosper. Follow them faithfully and you will be a success.

Captain John Byron, U.S. Navy (Retired)

Captain Byron served ten years as a sailor and was a chief sonarman before receiving his commission. He is qualified in both surface ships and submarines and commanded the USS Gudgeon (SS-567) and served on the Secretary of the Navy’s staff.  He was the Proceedings Author of the year in 1983 and 1993. He retired from the Navy in 1993 and now works for Johnson Controls.

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